Attachment issues

Some circumstances can make it more challenging for a child and their caregivers to form a secure attachment. These may include:

Abuse, neglect and trauma experienced by the caregiver or child
Parental mental health difficulties
Parental substance misuse
The child moving to live in multiple foster homes
Parents being separated from their baby just after birth, for example if the baby is receiving neonatal care
Stress such as having a low income, being a single parent, or being a young parent
Bereavement or loss of another caregiver that a child had an attachment with

As a result of their lived experiences, children and young people may feel unwanted, unsafe, and anxious. They may think they are unlovable and unworthy of affection, and ultimately feel rejected. Attachment issues often emerge as a pattern of behaviour over time, particularly during moments of stress or discovery.

This pattern might include:

being fearful of or avoiding a caregiver
becoming extremely distressed when their caregiver leaves them, even for a short amount of time
rejecting their caregiver’s efforts to calm, soothe, and connect with them
not seeming to notice or care when their caregiver leaves the room or when they return
being non-responsive to their caregiver
seeming to be depressed or angry
not being interested in playing with toys or exploring their environment

As children with attachment issues get older, these behaviours may change. As well as being evident during times of stress, some behaviours may start to become obvious at other times. These may include the child or young person:

finding it difficult to ask for help
may inaccurately read non-verbal cues and misinterpret communication
struggling to form positive relationships with adults and peers
struggling to concentrate
struggling to calm themselves down or control their emotions
both demanding and rejecting attention or support at the same time
becoming quickly or overly angry or upset, at times with no clear triggers
appearing withdrawn or disengaged from activities
daydreaming, being hyperactive or constantly fidgeting or moving
be very anxious

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